Character Study: My Breaking Points
I’ve taken a week or so to do some hardcore personal reflection, these last few months have sent my entire life into an unstoppable whirlwind that has essentially destroyed my reality and personal growth, so I took a step back to reevaluate myself in hopes I could get back on track. Amidst all of the shit that’s happened recently, there has been some good that has come of it. I’ve toughened up. But it came with a cost. My breaking points. I realize now that this is my biggest goal at the moment, to actually fix this about myself, because it is not something to be proud of. I’ve become so hard towards so many things that I bottle up the worst of things, bite my tongue, and try to hold on. But when it gets to be too much for me, which has been quite a lot recently, I snap, I break, I fall apart. So here is a summary of what I’ve learned about myself during my week of rest.
"Cold-hearted? No. She’ll just tell you anything she can to keep you from hurting her.Empty? No. She’ll just tell you anything she can to keep pain away. She’s resilient and she’s hard as a rock but even the strongest need soft spots to stay alive. She holds herself together so well that when she breaks, oh, hell breaks loose with her. She keeps herself so composed that when she gets mad, especially when she gets sad, nothing will be worse. She’s not been weak in years, but sometimes even she can’t hold the world together. So when she falls apart and she’s mad or sad and her universe is shattered and her world is failing her, be there for her. Chances are, she was there for you when you had no one. I can assure you that when she needs you, oh, she needs you. You should know that she’s been through hell and back so she sure as hell will get through whatever it is she’s going through. But give her time, give her a hand, show her love. Most importantly? Believe. In. Her."